This month has been a horrible flashback to 2020. I'm sure many of you feel similarly.
Here's how my month went. First, my main caregiver tested positive for Covid while my dad was getting over it and my mom was just starting to get Covid. Oh! My sister tested negative on Christmas Day but not Christmas Eve. So, I spent Christmas Day with my roommate. Claudia is a complete joy and a sweet soul. Nonetheless, I was heartbroken about being away from my family on Christmas.
I would say one caregiver tested positive every other day to the point where I took a Covid test every other morning as part of my routine. I did ask my caregivers to double mask or wear a KN95 mask
around me and I wore one mask around them. I double masked or a KN95 mask for physical therapy and running errands. It's a constant stress. I was living in a dark circus that I wanted out of.
Most of my caregivers tested positive in January through no fault of their own. I grinded through the insurmountable stress. I also needed to constantly be looking for people to cover shifts. That is a tremendous stress too.
Natalie, one of my dear friends who I love very much; I texted her on a Friday night and basically said I need you to come over because I need to talk to someone other than my caregivers. I appreciate my caregivers, but I need to see my friends for two main reasons. One, I need to pop my bubble and realize everyone has something going on. And two, I NEED A BREAK. When my friends are over, it’s like a little bit of my disability falls away and I get back to a place of joy and I can reset. I will note for safety reasons that Natalie had Covid a month before and I hadn’t been exposed in over 7 days, so we got together in a safe capacity. I was able to take off the “employer” hat and just be me. At the end of our visit, Natalie said something interesting. She thanked me for letting her in when I wasn’t all positive and happy. That’s a good friend right there.
The fact that I did not get Covid last month is a mystery. I don’t know how I did not manage to get it. I’m going to let the mystery be and count my many blessings all of which are you.
Love,
Hannah!
